Ya Ya You Is Welcome

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

So they say part of the reason why we dream is to store events of the day into our long term memory, or at least this is what I've heard. And I've been consistently having dreams about Rob for the past month. There are some that are just simple dreams, like he and I just sitting in at a restaurant, waiting for food, talking like old times. Other times it's usually me watching him from a distance, as if i were visiting school and watching him intereact with people without having him suspect that i was there. And othertimes the dream starts off like the first one I mentioned and then I spend the whole dream trying to get it back, sturggling to just get back to him. I usually always wake up unsuccessful. Which in a way is a sort of good thing cause I'm not waking up to a harsher reality. My question is, why the FUCK would I need to stamp, engrave, or brand the memory of Rob and the process of getting over him any further into my brain than it already is!?!?!

So Friday's blog entry was pretty negative and I'd just like to say that this weekend was quite possibly one of the best weekends I've had in a while. Friday came and left and yea, pissed me off a little bit but it's all gravy cause Friday night was Sarah's visit back to Queens for the weekend, to spend time with ME! Friday night I had my poetry reading. Although I've read the poem plenty of times, this was quite possibly one of the best readings I've had. Being up there reminded me ho wmuch I missed reading, how much i missed being on a stage and reading poetry. I still have a lot of work to do in terms of just being a better poet. that night, sarah and I trecked over to 11th and 3rd to the lovely NYU dorms and crashed at Yomna's for the night. We were up easily till about 5 AM just talking and catching up. It was really good. The next day I officially became a customer of 99 Miles to Philly, and bought myself a cheesesteak sandwich, which was fucking AMAZING! That night Sarah and I went over to the Cornelia Street Cafe and saw my sister read from her finished novel. Then we trecked up to W67th to meet up with Smilky and Kelsey. We smoked a bowl in Central Park and proceded to Makor to see Stop Making Sense on the big screen. Which was of course phenomenal. It was really good to just be home for the weekend. It was especially nce to have Sarah with me. I love that girl with all of my heart and this weekend further confirmed how awesoem of a friend and person she is. I know she and I will be friends for a very long time.

This past weekend i had thoughts of just moving back home. Just going to school and do great things with life outside of school. I feel so saturated in like Purchase life here, I feel really limited. I feel really bored. Things here just feel really petty and stupid and childish. I feel like I either need to transfer or just start doing things that make me happy. I should just do what I did this weekend, GO HOME every weekend. I think i'll be happy doing that. I feel like little to no inspiration here. Very few people are constantly amazing me with who they are. I dunno, everything I dislike about the school is the mere fact that i feel really limited, that's what everything boils down to.

ok I've suddenly lost the interest in writing this blog entry, so I'm gonna just stop it here.

Friday, March 04, 2005

Jackson Heights is stupid, REALLY stupid! For a number of reasons.

-First of all the JH post office is unfortunately under the misconception that people only apply for passports on fucking Tuesdays and Wednesdays

-Second of all Rob works here. Rob is stupid, therefore Jackson Heights stupid and so is Garden School. (sorry guys)

-Third of all it's too damn cold which makes me even more bitter about the previous 2 reasons. Also becuase I couldn't sleep without waking up from my toes being too damn numb in the middle of the night.

So now I'm gonna list things I'm excited about to make me feel better.

1. Sarah's coming in 6 hours and I am so fucking psyked to see that skanky blonde!
2. A possible viewing of Stop Making Sense on the big screen in the city sat night? (find out more at the Flavorpill)
3. Spring break in Argentina.
4.Trip to Boston to see a Radiohead lazer light show.
5. Eating paper.
6. Larry's visit to NYC!