Ya Ya You Is Welcome

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

So my summer has sort of gonne through a weird wave it started out completely hectic, it was like being in a subway car at the peak of rush hour. Lexington avenue is code for the end of June. All the people rush out and all of a sudden you find yourself standing in train car completely alone, seats empty newspapers saving the seats for you, empty coffee cups and power bar wrappers are slightly rolling back an forthe as if someone had been there a minute ago. So i wouldn'y say that the end of june was rock bottom or anything but i felt the negativity overwhelming my brain suffocating it from thinking one positive thing or at least allowing me to feel it. and not i've sort of levelled out, relaxed. it's a comfortable train ride, kinda of like the long island railrooad smmooth and quiet for the most part, enough seats are empty that the passenger has choices upon entering the car. i feel like I've leveled out. i do stuff but there are times where i stop and think man i don't have a thing to do today. Now things feel balanced.

Aida read my tarot cards last weekend it's weird how dead on some of the things turn out to be, pretty much everything she read about my past was true, i mean everything, one card came up and said that through positive thinking things will get better. that i'm facing and going to be facing a time when there is going to be negativity and positiviity but i need to stick to the positive control my mind and my emotions. and it's weird a lot of the times i am upset, sad or angry i bring it on myself. I think about things so much, i dissect things so much that i forget to just enjoy them. I let my mind wander and it tends to just sleepwalk into a dark alley. So i guess hearing that from a deck of cards really sort of did something to me and it's kind of snapped me out of this negative head.and has conitinued to do so every time i walk by a dark enterance. Anyway...

But hanging out with Aida was truely a special evning, we hun gout and talked after the reading. I rolled us a killer joint and during our high as a kyte frenzie we busted out journals and read back and forth old poetry and quotes we had come accross and loved. and it was just us. We really had a bonding day. I feel like she and I are like the same people sometimes. The evening was followed by Edward Scissorhands with Danny, which was really a fantabulous time. The next day i saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and I must say I was expecting a little more. It seemed too borderline. It gave a little of what I wanted but not nearly enough.

The next day Danny Eileen and I watched Vanilla Sky. It was my and Eileen's first time seeing it. I loved the movie, it was really good. I thought it progressed from reality into dreams into i'm starting to lose track of what's real and what's not, into i really dunno what the fuck is going on at ALL into, OH! It was an uplifting movie. It made me really happy.

Smiles all around for me. THE SUMMER IS ALMOST OVER! this is weird!

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Things I've heard or read that pertain to me right now?

"God doesn't listen to what I say."

"Il me semble que je serais toujour bien là où je ne suis pas"

Monday, July 04, 2005

Wednesday night was quite possibly one of my favorite evenings in a while.

I woke up that morning and the first thoughts entering my head were "I'm gonna see a musical GENIUS tonight!" I walked to work singing at the top of my lungs, blasted great music in Jason's studio, seen as though he was gone for half the day, and I mopped and danced half the day away. Ran some errands got caught in the rain, BUT IT DIDN"T RAIN ON MY FUCKING PARADE!

i rushed to 23rd street after work met Julia in the train station and jetted to Lucy's where we would meet Danny and Lucy and indulge in the forbidden fruits known as LSD and MDA. After sitting around for a little while we made our way to central park summerstage. After maybe a half hour wait we found ourselves a comfortable spot in the crowd at the stage and waited. By this time I was feeling the effects of whatever I had taken. Then David Byrne came out on stage and I don't believe I've ever been as star struck. i found myself standing there staring in disbelief at the white hair the cut brown outfit and the fact that I was looking at David Byrne with my own two eyes on stage. At this point and at this point ONLY did I realize how good this show was going to be. Needless to say, he rocked the fuck out. He played nearly everything I wanted short of Tiny Apocalypse. But Niave Melody, Un Di Felice Eterea, Psycho Killer, I Zimbra, The Great Intoxication, What A Day It Was, Life During Wartime, Like Humans Do and many others did MORE than make up for it. David Byrne and Radiohead have been my favorite live performances.

The concert ended with a really snapppy brass group playing gospel songs, making us feel the wrath of God and sending us to heaven. The music was good but the persistent God references harshed my mellow. Cause as into it as I was, God was the last thing on my mind.

After the show Danny Julia and I spent more time walking around Central Park I jumping in puddles, walking through jungly area's, getting freaked out by crazy pilots quaking at an empty pond before meeting his slut NY mistress. We walked in one huge circle ending up at the old summerstage. Then we took a cab to Danny's.

When we got there it was bong hit bong hit bong hit Shpongle, Radiohead, and Matisyahu and some crazy visuals. I closed my eyes and really just relaxed giving my mind free reign to explore all ends of my imagination. I had never given my brain that honest attempt and I regretted not having done it before. I'd never experience something like that, a train of visuals that i could just sit there and let happen without any control because the minute i tried to control it the visuals would shatter into a million pieces. This was all followed by a 4:20 smoke down and train ride back into the Heights with Julia.

Other than that i've spent the last few days really enjoying the outdoors and I missed doing outdoorsy stuff. A day in Central Park with Fio and Charlie, and 2 days in a row at the beach. Tonight I want to see explosions HUGE GINORMOUS fireworks. Can't wait.